AH HA!! fix this com again..but then if breakdown again then i don know liao..anyway damn busy and tiring for this dew days..not to mention i was freaking pissed off also..damn pissed off..super super pissed off ar~ haiya ok la..later going out liao le..BYE~ will blog if my com still works..:D

I will not be blogging till my com is fix, so that all and nitez bye :)

Today went to two places only lo..but then go whole day wor..LOL..in the middle got go home and rest then go out again..Hmmm..then until now then reach home..:) tml school..T.T stupid luh..then i now so late then go sleep..die liao lo..tml sure ZOMBIE wan..-.-..again do such a cum gong thing..tml i sure suffer~ arghh!

I was stuck along my road, unable to move on..BUT why..why do i see the end of my road..why issz so short..but seriously i don wan to move even IF i am able to because the past still lingers in me..what for move on when its going to end..why walk back when history will keep repeating itself over and over again like a tape recorder..I am always right..but i dont want to be right for this time..this time i just hope that i can be wrong..wrong about my instincts..wrong about my intuition..wrong about moving on with me and myself..i walk a lonely road..a road that oftens gives me the most hope and also the least hope..

ok la..my "menses" last damn long..LOL..mood swing for a month le i think..come also for one month le..XD ok la..i need to get some sleep le..and oh ya..THE "NG" bank is up for a loan..LOL..but then still limited..XD ok la..NITEZ ALL!!

Haiya~ New Year leh..cannot so moody de..BUT what to do..-.-..ZZZ anyway later still need to go to three places i think..then sianz la..tml got school~ Arghh!! Wa piang eh..haiz..damn tired now la~ ytd sleep 4 then today wake up 9..-.-..win liao lo..now like panda liao~ ZZZ..HATE IT!! CUM GONG LA~if i know ytd i don sleep so late..arghh!!

Thinking why..even though its only a few days and i am feeling this way..anyway in my previous post the first wan..there is a code that need to be decoded..haha..ok it might be stupid But then i also don know why i did it..sometimes i really wonder why do i always get hurt..even though i knew somehow or someway i will be hurt..BUT i never regret anything that i did..ok la going soon le..BYE~

Today went out..Today also is the ANG BAO DAY~ XD anyway very tired today la..waited for taxi damn damn long..-.- damn pissed off too..Arghhh!!! tml again need to go out..then wed got school...Zzz hate it la..Haiz just now take with Jo alittle while..don know why whenever i think of you or whenever somethings reminds me of you..i am really sad..its been long since i felt this way..haiz..I go take a rest first later then i use com..:D NITEZ!!

Today's The Reunion Dinner..:) Well~ Had Yours? :D Dont forget not to sleep too EARLY today hor~ today is the shou ye day..LOL..So~ DON SLEEP EARLY~ :) so today i wont be sleeping early today ba..XD got excuses liao..mother cannot ask me off com liao..coz today i SHOU YE FOR THEM..XD ok la..it seems that i will be dota-ing le..:) THAT ALL~ HAPPY CHINESE NEW YEAR TO ALL~ DON SLEEP~ NITEZ..:)

Today went out with Zy marcus and derek to parkway..Partly is also because of marcus interview at the wine shop den another reason was....derek say wrong..-.-..he actually wanted to go the plaza sing de but then hor he type wrong and said parkway..LOL..then go parkway lo..HAHA..den after lunch there then we went to shop around parkway also..saw doreen then also bought my mic..XD

After that went to ecp after eating our dinner to slack..HAHA..talk about alot alot of stuffs..LOL..damn funny..and angry...-.-..coz say until 7th jan de..ZZZ around i think 10 like that we went home le..:) Anyway better don let me see you during Chinese New Year..i wont hold back this time..i promise this time i will fight back..and for your infomation, i don make empty promises..:) so just mark my words..:D..anyway on the way home went to meet derek gf and stalk xw and his gf..XD they have "breathing" lesson luh..LOL..so we leave early then..HAHA..ok la..thats all TEST MY MIC LE~ NITEZ!!!

Haiya~ actually thought never go play bball de..end up leh..say and say then become play liao lo..XD then ok la..was tiring duh! but then fun also..:D then my lunch today was..two cups of lemon tea a few mouths of 100 plus and then two packet of 3 in 1 milo..XD tonight dinner sure eat alot alot de~ Hmm..swee la..two more days can wear new clothes le..XD thats all la..not much happening in my life nowadays..:) thats good too..if not troublesome..that all..:) NITEZ!!

Today's Ckt lab hor..can die ar..first time do test left two pages blank de..-.-..den when ending all the class also almost the same then all scared liao..so all start to copy le..HAHA..but then hor got some still need to let teacher see then can get marks so for me hr..i think i can get a pass if all is right..if one wrong = fail..LOL..but then nevermind..today the comprog test..OMG..i thought will gone case coz i never print any notes to guide me..then don know why suddenly my friend got extra then hor i manage to see from there..HAHA..SOMEMORE HOR I THE FIRST TO DO FINISH SIA~ OMG!!!! then is full marks liao..WOOO~ damn happy..:D

Anyway after school meet derek xw and dickson in the school for dinner lo..went to mensa to eat western..den after that go to IT school to have deserts then talk awhile then go home le..:D ok luh..Chinese New Year coming~ Wooo can wear new shirts..XD Swee~ haha..ok la..rest le..anyway melissa still treat me as bad as always luh..but that is the her i know..:) this way is better haha..ok luh..AND I SAW MY EYECANDY~ XD ok ok..i log off le..NITEZ!!!

Haiya..siao liao la..tml still got test leh..kao eh..early morning some more..then got test still nevermind..TWO SOMEMORE..ZZZ..want to siao liao lo..two somemore i never learn de..Zzz..how to pass..wa piang eh..today i buy $1.90 rewritable disc for ym project..T.T never claim..T.T haiya~ nevermind la..LOL..then today derek come to our school wor..HAHA..he sooooo~ happy..LOL..but then hor is come VISIT only..XD ok la..thats all for today le la..seriously don knwo why these few days really super tired..like never sleep for alot of days like that..Zzz NITEZ!!!

Haiya~ today eyes got problem la..seems ugly luh..coz many people say that i look like never sleep for alot of days like that..eye bag today damn serious..don know why..actually today don want to go psychology lecture de..but then hor..think think end up decided to go lo..since i last week never go..LOL..after that went home straight la..should be sleeping earlier than usual i guess..HAHA..ok la..thats all turning in soon..NITEZ!!

Hello~ all..:D today went to school la..stupid wan la today..haiya~ actually when got school is stupid wan..HAHA..tiring for today..dont know why very tired lo..then also realised this week alot of test..Siao liao lo~ haiz..troublsome shit la..

I never say that i cant accept friendships between us..you thought so..but did i said that..haiz..tired to explain..tired to clear myself..there is only one question in my mind now..haha..whatever la..NITEZ!!!

Today went out with mother and sister to get my white pants..WUHAHAHAHA..finally got it..:) den get my shoes at Converse too..standard wan..every year sure is Converse shoes de..XD don know why also..LOL..then also..get my sis shoes den go pop awhile thought that derek will be there..but then he go break with gf i think..so we went home liao..went home do my programme then is sibei hard de lo..hard dao~..haiyo~ LOL..den nowadays internet got problem..but then i think is my computer la..damn freaking pissed off already la..haiyo..ok la..go do my things liao..NITEZ!!!

Today went to town to see clothes..haiz..so sad..never get anything from there..but then something from vivo..XD thought that i would be able to get another pair la..but then never..T.T..ate steamboat at vivo den go the open place slack..talk about alot of stupid stuffs in secondary school..those memorable days..HAHA..funny~ went home around 10 plus..saw tim in bus..den walk home also coz wanted to see xw's gf..XD One question and they are gone..LOL..teacher dont want student liao..:( Awww~ haha..

Sometimes i really wonder why cant anyone of you get my real meaning and intentions..issz because i am that kind of person in your mind os issz just that i don want to state clearly..because when i trying to make it obvious..neither of you get what i mean..so no point..why jump into conclusions when you all don know what i really mean..seriously i am really tired..seriously sick of everything that i have been through..everythime its going round and round repeating ever single thing over and over again..almost listening to a repeated script over and over again..its been this way for years and it never change because its me..since you all cant get what i mean..so whats the need for me to explain further..for pity and sympathy??

What for explaining when there are still doubts..be it whether you all understands me or not, whether you all get it or not..i don care..as long as i don need any pity nor sympathy from any of you..i really don need any..i really dont give a damn..maybe what people say about me all along was right..no point trying to improve things when things are constantly deproving..there will be no ending..I guess it appears that my intention and meaning was misunderstood..Well~ i guess i will let it carry on this way..whatever think whatever you all want to think..no point trying to be nice..because i am always mistaken as a bad guy..feeling damn down..but don show pityness..i hate it..whatever la..tired of my life le..NITEZ!!

Hmm..It seem that you have mistaken me..haiz..i am lazy to explain it le..i maybe tried my best..and i think maybe thats the best i can do..i don know will you still be reading my blog..but since you said you don even give a damn den i got nth to say..if you think i am that kind of person den carry on..seriously..i know you have your reason for ending..at this point of time you might think i bullshit..but nvm..haiz..well~ i guess that it..you will be hating me after all..i have not forgetton that day..and its still hard for me..it matters to me alot..i give a damn..i care..but it seems.....haiz..nvm..NITEZ ALL~

Wa..damn tired lo..played bball today and hor blisters burst today..LOL..this wan damn pain..haha..but then nvm la..used to it le la..haha..too tired le...nth to blog anyway..anyway tml going out buy clothes le..Wooo~ ok...NITEZ!!!

YoYoYoYoYoYoYoYoYoYo..Yo~ Yo~Yo~..XD haha...geting high here..YOU MEI YOU..YOU~ HAHA..anyway finally had my haircut..Wuhahaha..damn song! haha..after so long of saying to cut hair..anyway today tot go with derek de..den he need to pei Gf..sianz..den nvm call dick..Zzz..already say is dick liao..so don need to ask also know is nvr follow me..den Ric also got dragonboat..Zzz...den nvm la..tot of don wan cut de..end up scared wait say and say den drag and drag den later sure wont cut de..sooo~ decided to cut lo..:D

Anyway today's ComProg..haiya..don need say much..nvr learn..means obvious liao lo..Hmm..ok la..anyway have you ever tot that when you die..who will you be remembered as..Or do you like to be remembered as someone great..HAVE YOU ?? HAVE YOU ?? HAVE YOU?? No right~ LOL..ok some examples if you don understand what i mean..The following examples below are not real and don mean anything coz its just an EXAMPLE..XD

Wa...today's psychology the best..most relax..LOL..coz its a relax lesson..let us sleep den do some psycho exercise..haha..actually not supposed to laugh wan..but then hor..i laugh la..HAHA..coz when the teacher saying the instructions like all go wrong like that..LOL..not only i laugh, others also..XD then after that go home le lo..so sianz..tml comprogram test..GG liao..don need care already..:) anyway so wan to play bball on friday and going out on sat..HAHA...ok luh...NITEZ!!

HAHA!!! Hi All..Hello Everyone..Yo All..Hey All..Ni Hao Ni Men..Wass Up All..Welcome All..LOL..thats all i can think of liao..XD i bo liao here la..skip my maths lecture today to learn for my maths quiz..-.-..den end up see the paper is hard dao~ but then hor tsk..WHAT IS MATHS..LOL..jking la..i also not so sure how to do la..haha..just anyhow write only lo..can get good marks then good lo..cannot then bo bian lo..XD Hmm..den today never go psychology lecture la..damn sianz lo..so skip la..LOL..

Saturday think should be going out again..to get another pair of clothings..i tihnk should be alot of people going i think? LOL..ok la..need to get some rest le..den later go slp liao..HAHA..Bye All..Zai Jian Ni Men..Goodbye All..Sayonara All..XD ok la...NITEZ!!!!!

YO YO YO!!! WASS UP!!!! LOL...haiya don know why hor my blog like got problem de..-.-..quite a number of people can view my blog..Zzz..don know what happened unless you got firefox if not sure cant view..-.-..don know what happened also..KAO!! anyway today in school don know why damn sian lo..and hor my stupid PSPS teacher...SHE NO HAIR IDIOT!!! say vuglar pay money nvm..but then say "Oh SHIT" also need to pay money..-.-..she got problem ar..shit where got vugalr..-.-..den still teach us can only say "KIM CUM KONG" as subsitute..don know what the hell is the word..like some thailand word like that..SHE EAT SHIT LUH!!! -.- NO BRAIN OR WHAT!!

LOL...say finish liao..XD damn sianz la this few days tml got quiz den thursady also quiz...stupid la...ok la...go to go le la...NITEZ!!!

Today went out with parents den go tampines mall walk walk awhile lo..tot will buy clothes but then nvr see dao i like de..so end up leh..a wasted trip...then come home damn tired lo...don know why...nth to blog anyway..boring lo today...haiz...nth to do seriously...eh except for missing that someone la..LOL...YOU KNOW HOW MUCH I MISS YOU BADLY NOT~ ARGHHH~~~~!!! but it doesn't matter anyway..coz the person does not..haiya...tired tired tired...NITEZ!!!

Today went for New Year shopping...den get two shirts and one pants...LOL...next week will be getting another pair..:) anyway the shirt is damn Ex...-.-..$46.90..WTH..but then nice leh...bo bian buy nia...den jason siao buy two newbie shirt..Zzz..while i get one, derek get one and his gf get one...den hor member card we nvr take wor..ZY TAKE..-.- Sooo~ wrong..after that went to eat a korean cuisine...den go starbucks there slack slack lo...talk alot of fun things and ask alot of fun things...XD den go home le...since derek and his gf need to go home..anyway next sat going orchard and vivo i think...muz get anohter pair liao...haha...ok la...damn tired now...NITEZ!!!

Stupid com i have...yesterday i just repair..today come back from home spoilt..-.-..Wth can~ haiyo~ anyway hor..today school only 1 hr nia..HAHA..BUT THEN TOO BAD SOME PEOPLE LATER DEN CAN GO HOME LA...XD So~ at around 10 like that go eat den go bball liao..until like around 3 like that den go home den found out this stupid bangala com spoilt la..=.= shagged..again need to format den format until keep having problems la...fed up change shirt den go meet Zy they all for dinner lo..den after that slack at Mac den go home around 9 plus with derek coming my house to help with the formating of the com..this will be the last time man..-.-..spoilt again call repairman liao..zzz..

Dreamt of us..dreamt of the way i always wanted it to be..but then when i woke only to realised that it was all a dream, i was disheartened..Well~ alot of people say the dreams you dreamt don come true..So it seems to be this way now..the way to what i don want..but yet got no choice but to see it going this way...Why must i go through all this..Issz just another test to give from me.......haiz...

Tml go see shirt and buy clothes le..hope to buy more new clothes..:) Anyway this year going for Shirt...HAHA..ok random~...thats all le...NITEZ!!!

Hi all~ Haven die yet..LOL..anyway since u never let me die today..Well~ i can say u will regret this...coz from today onwards you will what ingrateful will be like..and i will let you see how crazy i can be..if you don believe me..I DARE YOU TO TRY ME..i meant what i say and i don give empty promises..just don let me see you..:) Anyway thks for eveything throughout the years but sorry from now on..but also that doesn't gives you the right to punch me right at the back of my head..You want to see who kill who...I SHALL SEE WHO KILL WHO..:) Don't test me...patience have limits and i have mine too..and its to the max..Dont think i am like the past...i don give a damn and if you touch my family or me or anything else or watever else...LOL...you will get it from me..I GIVE YOU MY WORD..

Anyway hor...yesterday when i type that post is because i don wan to suddenly dissappeared and have any regrets la hor...LOL...those messages too...ok la...finally fixed my com..ok la...i go slp liao...NITEZ ALL~

Ok this might be my last post la...LOL...MAYBE NIA~ maybe not...LOL...eh...anyway CCB don sore loser when u wan to settle things in that way...i will remember this very day u punch me hor...LOL...this wan not petty this wan worst still not my parents wor...why cant i know wat happened come home only ask wat happened lo...scold me like nobody business wor...lol...den punch me wor...lo...u wan to see how siao i can become lai lo...i will let u see how siao i can be...i not scared u tml come la...i dare you la hor...say so much things and yet still she de like that punch me...LOL...wat nonsense...every year come disturb one time...fun ar...this year is the worst wan to like that nvm de...LOL...those who read this blog might think is my fault and i petty la..LOL...i don mind la...haha...think all you wan..:) i don care la...as long as i prepared for tml liao...u wan come den come...haha...don think i don dare lo...i am 18 this year..u wan to see ingrateful den i let you see wat is ingrateful...

Well~ in case la...any regrets i don wan so say now...thks brothers and sry to her and also thks to her...:) in any case just remember me..:) i will miss you all...Awww~ come on TOUCHED!!! LOL...ok la...thks to dick and jo la...LOL only they know...LOL...ok la..anyway MAYBE ONLY LA..have to see tml his face will swollen not..LOL..BUT THEN MAYBE I CAN FLY NIA..LOL..MAYBE ONLY...HAHA...ok la...NITEZ!!!

Heeeeeelllllllooooooooo~ LOL...boring here luh.. cant take it le..LOL..muz high abit..anyway today went to sch and hor i nvr study at all..Zzz..TOTALLY LO~ coz hor..RIC'S PSP LA..COME DISTURB ME..ASK ME TO PLAY..SO BAD LUH..den the Ric also buy the booster pack like nobody business..-.-..end up also i form deck for him de..Zzz...den hor..today do my COMPROG the flowchart..is like super hard can~ hard dao~..after that went to bookshop with Ric..LOL..he doing something luh..:x den hor i saw SWEETS..-.-..ALOT that i want to eat de..OMG!! damn tempting but then i need to save money luh..so NVM..other day then i go and BUY!!! tsk tsk..

After bookshop, go library to watch IpMan again on Lucas Iphone..den watch until going to 6 den go my Psychology lecture..its stupid and tml i got the tutorial can~ its simply sucks to the core..Arghhh!!! Sianz!!! After my lecture, meet xw to study wor..Ric don wan study with us coz he want to go home and form his YU-GI-OH deck to pass his CKT..LOL..den study for like an hour den go 201 eat dinner den meet derek and talk talk awhile den go home le lo..:)

Well~ another person say i look like gangster le..Damn sianz..Zzz..Yet, another person who judge a person by its looks and no offense ar..I don like this kind of people..Well, not saying derek the..YOU KNOW LA..LOL..Coz yours still okok..at least not so bad luh...I heard even more nonsense wan..LOL..But anyway i don know why nowadays people like to judge a person by its looks and its totally unfair to the person you judge by its look..You ought to know the person first before judging him instead of seeing its looks and then condemn him...Its totally bullshit...understand~ Zzz...ok la...i go slp liao...NITEZ!!!

Well....You See!! I KNEW IT..-.-..i should have go home yesterday earlier la..end up leh..to what i have expected..I WAKE UP LATE..-.-..soooo~ good..zzz..end up early in the morning i have to rush like hell..KAO EH~

Hmm..I hate to go school la..troublesome lo..don know when holiday leh..arghhh..!! Anyway someone in my school is slowly pissing me off liao..-.-..don know why when bad word come out from his mouth i damn feel like take lighter burn him..-.-..not only me who is irritated by him..almost whole class i think..LOL Whatever la hor..you don come re me i don re you..:)Anyway today i just fail one stress test..-.-..anyway whatever that consist of stress the test i sure fail..LOL..

Hmm..anyway like i always got post this...Choices Have Consequences..Well~ i still feel this way too..many people just tend to make choices in a haste situation without even thinking hard enough whether what consquences will be ahead of them..hence they tend to take for granted for what they have and den later when they have to face the consquences, instead of solving it, they avoid it..-.- Why in the hell do people avoid it when this is the consquences that they made out of their choices at the first place..

LOL..ok enough liao..haha..anyway Good Luck to Marcus and Sihui and Derek and the Gf..LOL..forget name..:x Since i haven give them their my blessing..LOL..like they care~ LOL...ok la...NITEZ!!!

Today went to dickson house....i really don wan to stay at home....it will only make me feel even worst....go to his house eat lo...LOL...all those new years stuff...haha....den after that go eat dinner den slack awhile den go home le...hahax....really not looking forward to anything besides her msges...lets just say hoping....i don know why...i just cant get over with it so easily...i just cant move on when u asked me to....but why....why cant i....why cant i just forget everything....

Every single night...besides having my cheeks wet and not being able fall asleep...wat else can i possibly do....i sound stupid now....-.-...but its the fact....wat else besides coaxing myself to that maybe the next day when i woke up...i might happened to see her msg...maybe just a short one or something very random or maybe just simply send wrong...i don know...i just miss you THAT MUCH...hmmm....i sound damn useless now....-.-...ok no...i am useless....i know it coz thats wat many people think of me as...."haiya useless wan la you...", "haiya u so useless no point la..." haha....well when it comes to love...i am even worst than useless...

People always ask me "Why don wan....", "Why like that", "Sure Can wan ma..Why cant sia"...lol..The thing is, its not the matter of i wan or don wan...is the matter of whether i can a not...u all say it like free coz u all can but then i am not like you all..the thing is i cant...haha...Well i have prove time to time that i am right and watever i do is the same always...i admit to my fate..coz it will be the same for me no matter how hard i try to change it..in the end it will be back to sqaure one....anyway enough of my emo-ing le! XD tml going out to celebrate huiyu birthday....yuki yaki again...-.-...zy fault la...LOL...ok la...NITEZ!!!

Today wake up at around going to 3 like that...den whole day at home....watch show den play games la...nth much happen....thinking of projects deadlines...haiz...damn boring...life just issn't good for me....seriously it sucks....hope this year will be a better year for me....and of course...my wish for this year is that i don wan to be alone....not for days or weeks...but for long....anyway itchy hand go talk to her again....and thinking of what i have heard....it seems like this....proof* gone...haiz...i still do.....arghhh watever la..you wont know de la..haiz...anyway tml muz de-stress....NITEZ!!!

Well welcome 2009 and bye 2008....:) ytd my friends they all come my house eat steamboat...XD den we stay awhile den head to julius house ton...HAHA....tot can play dota de...coz julius house got four coms...-.-....but then end up three coms can play only den sian......end up go there nvr dota but then spend time go there watch Saw II and III! damn nice...haha....think will watch Saw , Saw 4 And Saw 5...XD see the blood flow damn shiok...LOL....abit sick here...:)

Anyway it seems i have trust the wrong person afterall....i have been stupid and foolish afterall to believe every single nonsense that was said..everything was maybe just a simple excuse..A simple excuse to end everything..hahaha....common of me again....everything just seems to explain itself now....but despite all this ytd when it struck 12..in my mind was still you....silly of me issn't it....i am starting my year with the thoughts of you....ya watever i was again..........nvm...tonight then blog BYE!!!

Name : Benedict Ng
Age : 19
Birthday : 14 Nov 1990
School : Temasek Poly
Msn : ben273273@hotmail.com

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